Kicks To Inner Peace!

So at first read this is going to seem like a weird title possibly detailing some extremely hormonal mothers journey to Inner Peace Kung Fu style! Well...the surmise is correct though it's not me doing the kicking! For me, the reality of pregnancy truly and deeply sunk in the day my little one started kicking inside. Being the control freak, obsessive gynaec that I am( as mentioned in an earlier blog!) I waited expectantly at 18 weeks as per the textbook definition to feel early fetal movements called quickening..and lo and behold! My baby didn't let me down..as I like to put it, it danced right on cue. And by 20 weeks my hubby was feeling the kicks too! Or as he says still 'Doing its little disco inside'! The frequency slowly increased to throughout the day and by then those kicks had become my own personal zen moments during the day. In the middle of a hectic schedule to feel the kicks in the middle of a surgery, while counselling a patient or simple during a mad rush to the hospital remind me to slow down and smile and think.."Yes..I feel you." Its as simple as that..this connection that starts growing to unfathomable depths because of something as simple as a kick! And so this is my advice to all moms to be.. No matter how bad a day u r having at work or no matter which end of the mood spectrum ur hormones are throwing you to..take solace in that kick..it's ur very own tiny baby guru saying u have something awesome inside you! Happy getting kicked y'all!

Midnight Mood Swings

This post is named so because that's the exact time frame to when my cravings are limited to..everyday without fail as the clock struck 12 my inner very hungry devil with an extremely discerning palate wakes up to torment the soul resting beside mine a.k.a. my husband. Now myth says that cravings in pregnancy usually consist of extreme tasting foods like pickles,imlis & everything sour and tasty in between. Not me..wanting to break stereotypes everywhere I go I want only ice cream. Or freshly pressed juice. Or that jerk chicken slider burger( with the perfect amount of cheese of course)! And not just any will do mind you! As if dragging him out of bed at midnight after having a hellish day at work with sweet smiles and blaming everything onto the baby wasn't enough he has to get the Belgian dark chocolate flavour that i crave with a compulsory waffle cone..nothing less will do. And so on and so forth..and if the shop doesn't stay open due to its  major flaw in not anticipating my cravings hubby darling gets to hear it till the next craving..or till in a desperate attempt to shut me up he manages to get my food the next day. But that doesn't happen often..(evil smile) Its actually really funny the stuff one can get away with in pregnancy when ordinarily those same situations would have led to a raging battle of the sexes! And I feel pregnancy apart from the obvious joys of impending motherhood should also be credited for testing and strengthening those tenacious bonds of marital relationship. I mean the amount of tantrums and frowny faces I throw at my dearest hubby its a wonder he hasn't booked a trip to the Himalayan meditation centre already!! And so..this post is also a tribute to my awesome,patient,lovable and darling soul mate..thank you for being there always..and being so thick skinned! It should be named the eighth wonder of the world!

Bedroom capers and the lack thereof

Bedroom capers and the lack thereof:
Ok..so this is not about me exploring the finer nuances of my writing via graphic bedroom details about my jaunts in the bedroom..nah nah! What I am instead writing about is the opposite! That I sure as hell wish I could write about those imaginary jaunts! 5 months pregnant and not one..I say not even one bedroom jaunt to talk about! Being a gynaec and a self proclaimed foremost authority on all things pregnancy I have happily counselled couples to go ahead and do it till the to-be-mommy is comfortable. I mean no way would we doctors take away such a basic pleasure away from a couple..we are not sadists..those poor guys are gonna have their lives turned upside down in 9 months! So u can hardly imagine the consternation when my hubby refused point blank to do anything beyond chaste kisses the day our pregnancy test ws positive. I mean what happened to celebratory sex and all that I imagine happy couples do?? Not one to give up every trick in the book was tried to convince him but in vain! As if that wasn't enough, I took him along for my sonogram to reassure him that all was well with the baby. Rest assured, one look at that and I was more untouchable than ever. His explanation? That till the baby is out he doesn't..well u can figure the rest out. While I finally gave up on convincing him I discovered something else. All of my pregnant and newly crowned mommy friends had pretty much the same story to tell. Come hell or high water Adam ain't ever eating that apple till delivery! While we were happy that our hubbys were so considerate caring and contrary to beliefs were much more capable of thinking with the heart and brains above the waist, at the same time from being in a "game on mode" before conception where bedrooms are quite frankly marathon sites for the sperms to catch the egg before it drops..this sudden transition to "game no more" for 9 months is  quite a shock for the marriage to say the least! This experience is limited to me and a couple of close friends.. Hopefully not everyone who reads this has the same story to tell. So feel free to contradict me anytime and even better..regale me with "tales" from the other side of pregnancy..in strict doctor patient confidentiality of course!(tongue-firmly-in-cheek!)

This body is not mine!

This body is not mine!
20 weeks in and finally settling into my pregnancy. Even getting a baby bump and trying as much as possible to flaunt it! Although my hubby says it just looks like I ve eaten too much for a fatty! Which brings me to my woes...what is happening to my body?? Now this question is obviously one that answers itself but being brought up on a steady diet of hot pregger moms with fab bodies and cute bumps that the internet n tabloids throw at us I had automatically assumed that I would be at least a couple of rungs lower down that ladder since i had an extensive pre pregnancy fitness routine comprising yoga gym and healthy eating. So imagine the shock when the boobs just keep getting bigger, my Kurtis keep getting tighter and the bump is not so much of a bump but more of a general fatty area! Have not had a paunch since after school( so proud!) so I  kept imagining my baby bump to come out as a graceful protuberance which was not hidden under layers of fat:/  Although m sure every single patient of mine who would have cribbed abt all of the above  would have been reassured by me reminding her of the wonderful gift at the end of the road secretly I envy those people who actually grow only around their tummies unlike my general fat absorption phenomenon. And m sure this must be a grouse pretty much with everybody who value their fit bodies achieved with daily kick ass workouts and regimes. Not like i dont try mild exercise and yoga but in the end nobody wants a pregnancy complicated by excessive stress.So now I have a new companion along the road down..my body who every day never fails to surprise me by sprouting out in directions I tght I had long lost down the years. What remains to be seen is how far we go! Cheers to all the calorie laden delights awaiting us!

Pregnant and a Superwoman!

It doesn't get more difficult than pregnancy combined with the high adrenaline job of a gynaecologist. When a woman in the throes of labour pain presents to us, it is as though a switch turns off thoughts of everything else but the patient. According to me all gynaecs especially the women in India are the world's resident experts on multi tasking. From attending to the pt to charting her progress to  dealing with waiting opd patients and deciding the menu at home, picking up the kids and then sprinting back for a difficult vacuum delivery they do it all! Now imagine it all with the same doctor but with half her energy reserves and the debilitating nausea of the first trimester! Any instrumental delivery requires at least 10 kg of pulling force to deliver the baby's head along with high levels of adrenaline! Going through that stressful process for every delivery knowing fully well how vulnerable she is to the environmental factors during pregnancy like all other women requires a degree of dedication and bravery that I like to believe is a  rare quality found only in  our gynaecs and that makes them no less than superwoman albiet a pregnant one! Now every non gynaec reading this would argue that every pregnant woman who balances her work and pregnancy should be labelled a superwoman and I am singing paens about gynaecs cz I am partial to them. Which is true! Going through the rigors of my  professional life while pregnant makes finishing every case a herculean task and leaves me feeling that nothing could be more tougher. But I am sure the same is true for every woman grappling pregnancy and work when she finishes that all important PPT , writing that  overdue software code or simply finishes a weeks worth of paperwork on time. Only the wearer of the shoe knows where it pinches and in our case every shoe fits a superwoman in her world! May we always fly high!

The Beginning...

So at the insistence of my darling sister and after reading what I like to call our patients' blogs on maternity I have decided to embark on this journey of describing impending motherhood through a gynaecs view. Although mostly consisting of my ramblings and some musings, i hope to  finally give into my long unfulfilled desire of writing without deadlines and  editors:)
10 weeks into my pregnancy and JD and I still on most nights marvel at this miracle. From my decision to start trying to his reluctance and exhaustion on those days of the months when performance was a must..from my sulking to his making up to me with weekend treats..and leading to that one glorious month when finally we both were in perfect sync and harmony! That itself is a tale best told only for our ears. Though I can now say I fully empathise with my patients who are trying to be parents and grappling with demanding work hours and competitive jobs at the same time where sex happens only on weekends and ovulation unfortunately doesn't and trying to keep up with my firm orders of doing it 3-4 times a week..empathy was never more better acquired!
So when it finally happened we couldn't believe it. I for one was the most sceptical since having seen a variety of infertile couples in all ages and sizes I was of the firm belief that my"plumbing " as I like to call it couldn't be normal by sheer association. A known  quality among most doctors who over diagnose and undertreat themselves, I was used to interpreting every period as a symptom! So we merrily went abt our business buying property fr my clinic and taking mind numbing ( according to me) loans cz I was very confident I would not conceive before a year was up. And look what my plumbing throwed up! But that was just the beginning...(ominous music...)
Once the pregnancy sank in, my usual over obsessive control freak self kicked in and my focus shifted from infertility to the group of patients who have first trimester complications. And there began a  stressful tedious path where everyday of the pregnancy I completed was a journey in itself. And I didn't stop work so any consults for first trim miscarriages would trigger fresh bouts of anxiety and fresh prayers..and every day was an achievement. My  mom bore the brunt of it coz  being another gynaec herself the reassurance reserved for anxious patients and relatives scarcely worked on me as I used the same words for my patients too but knew only too well that the inevitable in those unlucky pregnancies upto 7 weeks was not in our hands. And so we tensed and fretted and fussed and worried, till I crossed 7 weeks..and the scan showed a strong fetal heart. And then I could breathe! But only in between bouts of nausea, burping and puking. Ah yes..I had reached that point of my pregnancy where the joy had mostly evaporated into agonized hours of prayers that the meals I had would finally move south and I could stop feeling like a barrel of stored food..unfortunately for me and for most mothers at this time of the pregnancy food developed gravity defying abilities to mostly come right back up! Although my hubby adoringly calls it the baby's way of saying hi I would much rather limit its vocabulary this particular time! So here I am waiting impatiently for the remaining  2weeks to pass into my second trimester where me and my digestive tract can actually co exist peacefully!